To not let the kids father see their kids.
65671 upvotes
2504 comments
ellie_smile
3 months ago
gfycat.com
To not let the kids father see their kids.
Xxjacklexx
10028
3 months ago

As a father, I love seeing this shit. Not because I’m worried about the mother doing anything, but because it’s good to know there are people out there like this.

userunknown26
4323
3 months ago

Judge Judy the real MVP

Grantetons
2086
3 months ago

I can't imagine being a Manhattan family court judge. The fact that she's as reasonable as she is seems impossible given what she's probably had to sort through in court.

EDIT: I didn't mean what she's seen in the courtroom on Judge Judy the television show. She was a judge in Manhattan Family Court for years, which lead to news coverage in the LA Times and 60-Minutes, which lead to her TV Show. She saw some serious emotional trauma and never stopped being a compassionate person, driven for good.

Polske322
1284
3 months ago

She’s technically not a judge and is therefore not obligated to take the cases. She is an adjudicator (or something similar), who runs the adjudication as though it were a court. Legally she could just do it at a table if she wanted. Both sides have signed a contract basically legally binding them to honor the decision of the adjudicator, and the cases are real, but it’s technically not a real court just an adjudication dressed up as a trial.

savagepug
982
3 months ago

Adjudicator Judy just doesn't have the same ring to it.

[deleted]
906
3 months ago

The Ad-Judy-cator

nameoftheday
234
3 months ago

I think we found the spin off. Although I don’t know how it will be different, so maybe a re-brand...

TopShelfPrivilege
347
3 months ago

I prefer the more extreme spin off. "Judge, Judy, and Executioner"

ImAOneTrackLover
112
3 months ago

"Because the one who passes the sentence should swing the axe. Judge, Judy, and Executioner! Coming to network television on April 2020!"

somajones
46
3 months ago

"She didn't return the hair dryer she borrowed."
"Guilty. Bring me my axe."

_pmmeyourmemes_
22
3 months ago

...we don't have alligators in Australia

AshleyJoy03
3
3 months ago

Yea... I think he’s thinking of Florida?

RoseyOneOne
3
3 months ago

Works for me, +1.

IdiomaticIdiot
23
3 months ago

More $$$

KenpachiRama-Sama
74
3 months ago

I mean, yeah. She's the highest paid person on television.

vmoegan
51
3 months ago

Oh shit, I looked this up cause I knew you were wrong and you’re totally right. That’s crazy.

KenpachiRama-Sama
62
3 months ago

My favorite thing about it is that she literally just comes to her annual meetings and tells them what she's making. When someone new tries to argue and negotiate, she says the meeting is over and leaves. Then she gets a call later from someone higher up apologizing and telling her she'll get what she wants.

[deleted]
3
3 months ago

[deleted]

dbcanuck
4
3 months ago

Anyone remember Judge Wapner and the People's Court?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joseph_Wapner

MPK49
20
3 months ago

Syndication makes way more money because Judge Judy is running on like 6 channels many times a day, Tonight Show is on once a night on one channel.

SaltKick2
3
3 months ago

And works like 2 months out of the year

throwacloset
13
3 months ago

When you think about it this is all just one big retirement gig for her. Judy Sheindlin is currently 76 and was already in her mid-50's when the show started (which is around retirement age for a public servant in New York).

divsky2
124
3 months ago

This is true, but prior to her becoming famous from the TV show she was a real family court judge.

3sp00py5me
63
3 months ago

She may work as an adjudicator now but she is in fact a judge. She was a lawyer then she became a judge now shes a TV adjudicator. Correct me if I'm wrong but isnt becoming a judge like the judicial version of becoming a doctor, except even harder because you have to be elected into place? I know very little about judicial positions I fully admit but I was under the impression that it wasnt a position that just any ol lawyer could become.

MY_CAPSLOCK_IS_BROKE
15
3 months ago

It depends on the jurisdiction, but it is more difficult to be a judge than to just be any ol’ lawyer.

Here in California, you have to be nominated by the Governor to be a judge, and then you are then elected by the people to be a judge.

hokiewankenobi
10
3 months ago

Interesting tidbit - There are places in the US where you don’t have to be a lawyer in order to be a judge.

SliyarohModus
27
3 months ago

I live in one of them. For years we had a judge who was also the local plumber.

lolzidop
4
3 months ago

Depends on the nation, in the US as far as I'm aware you have to be elected, in the UK you don't (not in the same way anyway). As the US court is heavily linked to politics whilst the UK court isn't, not sure about elsewhere in the world.

Spudd86
8
3 months ago

Courts are always linked to politics because they interprete laws written by politicians.

lolzidop
2
3 months ago

That's as close as it gets in the UK though, our judges and lawyers have to be 100% impartial so political affiliation for laws does not come into it. None of our supreme court judges are chosen by the PM, and none of the other judges are brought in based on their political leanings either. The US on the other hand has its courts deeply embedded in politics, which isn't always a positive, especially when the president is the one who has the power to nominate supreme court judges. As they're likely to base it off the political leanings of the judge before how good they are as a judge.

Michalusmichalus
4
3 months ago

Her husband was also The people's Court judge for a few seasons. He is her exact opposite.

Sacred_Fishstick
40
3 months ago

Arbiter I think. Like the Elite with the sword but twice as badass.

woodelf
26
3 months ago

I prefer Master Chief Judy

JarlaxleForPresident
3
3 months ago

The narrator guy would take cortana's place and the show opens to mjolnir mix

brownbluegrey
3
3 months ago

Arbitrator. And the cases she takes are arbitrations.

But I would literally buy a new X Box right now if you could play Judge Judy in Hall.

BarfQueen
3
3 months ago

Arbitrator. The word everyone has been looking for is Arbitrator.

JimDixon
10
3 months ago

Arbitration is the word commonly used.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Arbitration

andrewthemexican
7
3 months ago

She deals in arbitration. Basically it's the two parties agreeing to go with the decision of a stated third-party as opposed to going to court.

CarlosFromPhilly
19
3 months ago

You literally just summarized what the guy before you said...

Sparrow50
3
3 months ago

It was easier to understand

Shawn411
7
3 months ago

The people are real, the cases are real, the decisions are final. This is Judge Judy!

MyBestVersionOfMe
163
3 months ago

If only I had her as a judge at my divorce proceedings, my life would still have full meaning. #ParentalAlienation

eltoro
67
3 months ago

Need to vent? I also have battled the court system. Though things are starting to turn my way, as my ex-wife's antics are becoming repetitive and her accusations aren't holding water.

[deleted]
41
3 months ago

My ex kidnapped my kids a few years ago. She was arrested two days ago, finally. I'm just waiting on a new court date now, and fingers crossed I'm guaranteed permanent custody finally.

To anyone out there being fucked with in custody battles, never give up.

060789
16
3 months ago

Man. I'm glad my baby's mama is reasonable. We've never stepped into court for anything. Even when we made our 50/50 schedule after doing the weekend thing for a while we sat down over a couple beers at the bar and worked out the schedule and then we worked on a revised budget that ended with me giving her less money every month.

That woman is a saint.

[deleted]
6
3 months ago

Is it possible to learn this power?

hell2pay
10
3 months ago

My ex took my son out of state for two years.

We sued in family court, my lawyer suggested against punitive and we settled for remediated, meaning I got 'make up time'.

Sadly, you can't make up missed years.

Edit: I changed can to can't, 4 hours too late. Hopefully people understood what I meant, oops.

[deleted]
4
3 months ago

You can't possibly make up missed time. You can get back money, possessions, anything else. But not time.

[deleted]
6
3 months ago

[deleted]

zacablast3r
38
3 months ago

You are a good person for offering that. Even if op doesn't take you up, you offered help to a stranger. Keep being awesome

dgr_874
26
3 months ago

Exactly this. You are not alone. Many fathers out there are going through the same thing. Reach out to them when it gets tough.

WhatisH2O4
10
3 months ago

Dude, this is so fucked. It's hard enough going through the break up and picking your life back up, then having to come to terms with your ex dating someone else and that person having an effect on your kids lives and everything else that comes along with parenting after a split, but when your ex actively tries to limit your time with your kids and then tries to replace you in your kids' lives...it's just heartbreaking. I went through that and was lucky that my ex stopped trying that last bit after she struggled and I didn't take any steps to take the kids away from her. It's so fucked and on top of that it's surprising how socially accepted it still is.

I really hope things work out for you, brother. It's not any easy struggle at any point, but I hope you at least get to see and have a good relationship with your kids. Keep your chin up and don't give up, even if your kids don't care now, they'll eventually understand and be grateful you stuck around.

WikN1990
6
3 months ago

Thanks for the kindness. It gets discouraging at times and honestly, I feel like she has broken me time and time again. What she doesn't know is I have an attorney and I'm building up my proof of how shitty she is being. My attorney has told me that she is basically digging her own grave and I'll have my children again soon. Really the only thing holding things up is I have to save money for all the court costs. I'll get there eventually. Until then, I just have to accept it all as it is now. I will have my kids again. I'm not too worried about that. I just have to keep my head up and keep moving forward.

Again, thanks for the kind words. I appreciate it, man. It's always a nice thing to have moral support.

PikaQ8
5
3 months ago

Dealt with the same. Cunt of an ex brainwashed them hard, convinced them it was "uncomfortable" for them to stay at my place, had kids make plans when I was supposed to pick them up and they wouldn't be there or had them cut the time short because they made other plans. The one night ( and only night they ever spent with me), a year or so after we split, that they did stay, we had a great time and she gaslit it all and tore it down as soon as they went back. She was breaking all the rules, but it didn't matter. Tried to fight for custody and the court atty came up to me in private and told me he's never seen such manipulation. My atty told me I could probably "win" but how much time and money did I want to spend, and even if I did "win" he said the kids could just say they didn't want to go with me and that was that. I cut if off there and after my family jumped in and told me to stop, they couldn't watch me humiliate myself anymore. No contact for years until one dinner a couple of years ago when it was more a fact finding mission for them to report back to her. Year later, my dad is dying, just as we established mild contact, they come to see him (but it was too late for him to actually see them, he was on life support ) with me in hospital and they were mature and seemed sincere, but my Mom called it...something was up. They connected with everyone on Facebook and were communicating. My sister tried to arrange something with them for that Father's day as a surprise for me and they never responded. They did a day before saying it would be an insult to their stepdad, a spineless fuck she also manipulates. My Mom had enough and let loose in an email calling them out on everything...it was truthful and deserved. The shit storm of dialogue after that led to me, and rest of my family, blocking them from everything. So....I had hope for a while after the first break, it was tough for a while, but after realizing I had no control of the situation I didn't dwell on it, just that kind of "when they can think on their own they will come around" type of hope. Now I have no expectation of ever seeing or hearing from them again, and am truthfully at at peace with it. I tried hard, humiliated myself, swallowed more pride than I had. I was a great Dad, did everything to take care of them when they were young and have fun. So yeah, fathers are treated like shit by the system. Still had to pay every month, with no visitation.

WikN1990
3
3 months ago

This...... This is my biggest fear. So many people tell me this can't happen. However, I know it can. Many women don't realize just how fucked up they are being. Men aren't made of stone. Contrary to what people might believe.

I am very curious, how do you not dwell on these matters? I try to not dwell on this stuff, but my mind just doesn't turn off. I'm genuinely curious how to do that because at times, I feel like it's driving me crazy. I just want my brain to go silent when this all comes to mind.

00__00__never
3
3 months ago

Never forget.

But let go of what is not yours to control.

PikaQ8
3
3 months ago

It was a conversation with my Mom that help resolve a lot. After years of seeing me struggle she told me to stop trying, that I had done enough and she didn't want to see this consume me, she cried, I cried. It was a wakeup call for sure, but the relief I felt after that was incredible. It helps to talk to people in the same situation for advice and stuff and also to learn about various outcomes. I've met a lot of people that were consumed by it and let it ruin their lives. It was the only thing they could talk about. It was painful to see people like this, miserable & sad for so long, you could see the years of pain on their faces. This scared me, I didn't want to live my life like that. Don't let anyone make your life miserable. Do the best you can, control what you can, don't stress about what you can't and move on. You have to take care of yourself. Find something else to focus on, workout, fix your diet, get in shape, find a hobby, anything. I do think about what could have been at times, but without regret. I like to say I have a great life and wish they were a part of it, but I can't make them a part of it and I'm ok with that.

00__00__never
3
3 months ago

You should get visitation.

But that stuff about your sister planning stuff and your mom writing emails. You want them in your family, but you don't want to hype up some drama.

Make sure the court appoints your time, and do your best. But the whirlwind of stepdad, grandparents and all the drama needs to be put aside. Just you.

neglectful_dad
8
3 months ago

Sorry buddy. I'm available to chat anytime you like.

UnanticipatedRacism
6
3 months ago

Erm... username checks out, kind of?

Got_pissed_and_raged
5
3 months ago

Fuuuuuuuck

HexenHase
3
3 months ago

This one definitely does...

vagrantprodigy07
3
3 months ago

Same here. Mine literally made that statement "Children should always be with their mothers"

indigojustice
3
3 months ago

It’s the entire system (in many states) that is fucked up. The laws out there assume you are a piece of shit father, who wants nothing to do with your kids. The laws are completely slanted in favor of the mother, in nearly every situation.

Sir_toolman
49
3 months ago

She was previously a family court judge before doing the show.

canisithere
22
3 months ago

She retired in 1996 after hearing more than 20,000 cases.

timnotep
14
3 months ago

She spent 10 years as a family court judge in Manhattan before her TV show debuted. She was offered her show as a result of her reputation as a fair and competent judge who was active and vocal in cases.

Even though her current role is that of an arbiter, rather than a judge, the woman had an entire career in Manhattan family court before she became the star of a reality show.

blueisbest
3
3 months ago

It can be horrible. I volunteer at the Brooklyn Family Court, and the cases are heartbreaking.

dick_is_love
86
3 months ago

What is MVP?

Dankany
310
3 months ago

Most Vigorous Placenta

BattleFarter
90
3 months ago

Most Voluptuous Penis

Strificus
51
3 months ago

Massive Veiny Penis

MuddyFilter
23
3 months ago

I just imagine Judge Judy hopping on reddit for the first time because shes trending like

why they calling me a penis?

babaganate
3
3 months ago

Mega Vega Pega

VerboseViking
3
3 months ago

Here, have my throbbing endorsement of this comment

CommunistWeavel
35
3 months ago

Goddamn

MrTooWrong
11
3 months ago

In case you were actually curious, this is the correct answer

inthefightgarden
156
3 months ago

Judge Judy

georgeousgeorgiewb
80
3 months ago

Most valuable player

mversteeg3
62
3 months ago

In case you were actually curious, this is the correct answer

NedryOS
35
3 months ago

Stop lying to these people smh my damn head

MelTorment
21
3 months ago

Smashing Multiple Horses my damn head

Czar_Muzza
10
3 months ago

Sex Me Here my damn head.

gotsickpassaway
3
3 months ago

Saving Mostly Hedgehogs damn heads.

WelcomeToKawasicPark
3
3 months ago

Suing my husband?

tyrizzle
9
3 months ago

Pfft yeah right!

walter_the_guitarist
65
3 months ago

Man vaporizing pedestrian.

I_Am_PH0ENIX
49
3 months ago

Midget victory pose

pokelord13
45
3 months ago

Mildly vicious predator

K_S_Nixon
4
3 months ago

Like an annoyed badger.

heuve
36
3 months ago

Minimum viable product

thekoogs
9
3 months ago

This guy PMs

_ghost_of_harrenhal_
31
3 months ago

My Vaping Penis

Massive_Explosion
11
3 months ago

I vote this be the new meaning of MVP

JonerPwner
23
3 months ago

Mitigating violent persons

Imthasupa
12
3 months ago

Milk viper penis.

Ashjrethul
11
3 months ago

To add to what others have said, it became a meme when NBA player Kevin Durant got MVP and in his acceptance speech said his mum was the real MVP.

psychic_egg
12
3 months ago

Moist vivacious person

12_bagels
12
3 months ago

Most very person

psychic_egg
11
3 months ago

Maybe very polite

oldboy_alex
9
3 months ago

Montel Vontavious Porter. A wrestler.

SomeIrishFiend
3
3 months ago

Tick tick, i hear the clock ticking

MaverickKaiser
3
3 months ago

Tick tock, you about to stop livin'

pantaloon_at_noon
9
3 months ago

My Volcanic Pope

does_my_name_suck
11
3 months ago

MVP stands for Most Valuable Player but it can also mean like you're the best or something

LikeUranus
8
3 months ago

Model View Presenter

psychic_egg
6
3 months ago

Mega vomit poop

SonnyVabitch
7
3 months ago

All the responses to this question are secret gfycat files.

DaughterEarth
3
3 months ago

Real answer is either most valuable player or minimum viable product. This time it's the first one.

El_Dudereno
35
3 months ago

She not in Forbes Top 50 highest paid entertainers for nothing!

dudewith3g
38
3 months ago

Not an American so I was shocked to read that. Then I googled and she is actually 4th highest paid celebrity.

This Judge Judy show must be better than crack.

ResolverOshawott
25
3 months ago

If reddit was any indication, people loooove justice porn.

SleestakJack
17
3 months ago

It's weird, actually. Most of us very rarely see Judge Judy, because it's almost universally broadcast in the middle of the day.

However, the folks that do watch it are a very particular demographic - mostly old retired folks. That's not the biggest money market for ads, but there are certain products that you want to target directly to that crowd. And that crowd is less likely to fast forward through commercials. As such, competition for that ad space can be more heated than you might otherwise expect, and that drives the ad rates up a bit. As a result, stations love to air Judge Judy at around 2-3 in the afternoon - a time during which they otherwise would have a hard time finding something else to broadcast that people would want to watch. So, the Judge Judy program sells to stations for more than you might expect, and you can pretty much guarantee that it's available in every market. The Judge Judy production company makes mad money - and their costs are really low. Judy's agent knows that and they negotiated a crazy-high salary for her.

I'm sure there are some hardcore Judge Judy fans with day jobs who record the program to watch it later - but that's a small group. Most of us only ever see it because it's on the TV in some waiting room or another that we find ourselves stuck in in the middle of the day.

Is_Not_A_Real_Doctor
4
3 months ago

It's been a staple of American TV for 23 years. I'd definitely give it a watch if you have the time. There are plenty of episodes on Youtube.

This is just the first that popped up on a quick search.

dudewith3g
3
3 months ago

Unavailable. Think that video is region locked.

Is_Not_A_Real_Doctor
3
3 months ago
dudewith3g
3
3 months ago

Wow she is great. I feel intimidated even though I'm not on the show.

I think I once saw a German copy of this show and it's not even close to the amount of pressure Judy has.

Is_Not_A_Real_Doctor
3
3 months ago

She can sniff out bullshit like a bloodhound and has no tolerance for fools. It's a supremely entertaining show.

frostedflakelover
3
3 months ago

Magical Vienna person

Passivefamiliar
361
3 months ago

As a father, going through a custody battle with a... mother figure who just drops him off with grandma but parades him around when it benefits her, I really need a judge like this.

I'm not fighting for full custody, yet, just 50/50, trying to avoid child support because I buy all his stuff anyway and the grandparents buy more than she does. But the entire system instantly demonizes me because I have a penis.

chantillylace9
193
3 months ago

I was a legal aid lawyer when I first got out of law school and it was so awful that we were always representing the woman, well, almost always. More than half the time the dad was a good person, a good dad, and the mom just had it out for him. I morally could not handle that job and left after a few months.

Now of course there were horrific instances of abuse from the fathers, but there were just as many who were just in brutal battles with their exes and it was now just a power struggle. At first, it sounded like the fathers were terrible from the stories I would hear.

But then I would get the fathers into depositions and hear the full story and I just felt like I could never win. I could win my case, but that was not a win. So no matter what happens, I, and the children lost.

There is no way in hell that I spent a quarter million dollars and spent 17 years in school to take kids away from loving fathers. I now practice in a different area and am much happier.

I really hope everything works out for you, it’s such a shitty situation to be in.

IDontThinkItWas
60
3 months ago

Happened to my cousin, tried everything to get contact nothing worked. Went to court all women sided with the mother, he asked for a male judge and solicitor. Turns out she has social services out all the time, evidence of emotional abuse and manipulation, she was pulled for lying about her son not wanting to see his father.

She still makes excuses saying he is on drugs and was abusive, turns out it was her that was abusive which got proved. He is still in courts as she still is using their son as ammunition fortunately for my cousin the courts have obviously sided with the dad, hopefully he'll get to have time with him.

Guarantee as the son gets older he is going to resent his mother and have some mental health issues because of her brainwashing and abusive attitude.

She won't even let him see any of his family at all because they are all in contact with my cousin, he used to when my cousin fell out with everyone but stopped it as soon as he got his act together.

She is also extremely jealous (coming from family members) that he has settled down and turned his life around. She has expressed how much she hates this.

An absolute pure evil piece of shit, if it wasn't for the male judge, he wouldn't have got this far and truths wouldn't of been brought out.

Some people in child legal system apparently got a serious talking to for sticking up for the mother.

fartsforpresident
31
3 months ago

There was a case in New Jersey where the mother attempted to murder the father, was convicted of that crime, and still won full custody of the kids.

corbear007
6
3 months ago

What the absolute fuck?

[deleted]
4
3 months ago

You’re (sadly) wrong about them resenting their mother. I dated someone (25f) who realized along with her sister when they were much older that their mother had gotten them to lie about their dad and refuse to see him until he gave in because he thought they genuinely hated him. She got more child support and he got less and less visitation. It was a heartbreaking story and yet they didn’t hold animosity toward their mom. They could “see both sides.” They loved their dad once grown (and I did too), he was a great guy.

aleydis17
31
3 months ago

I imagine they're referring to the cost of their education, undergrad + law school.

Get9
12
3 months ago

I spent a quarter million dollars and spent 17 years in school

That's what was said. OP spent that money on school, presumably law school.

TheCoquer
12
3 months ago

His degree most likely. ‘Murica, debt yeah!

Sirsilentbob423
7
3 months ago

Turning people into mother fucking wage slaves.

America! debt yeah

Wandering_Plasmon
43
3 months ago

It also doesn’t help that anyone who brings up the inequality of the justice system in custody cases tends to get called an incel and MRA.

Time4Red
17
3 months ago

Divorce and custudy laws are already gender-neutral. They were liberalized nearly 40 years ago. The problem is all the judges enforcing those laws with their own bias.

Wandering_Plasmon
29
3 months ago

Judges are a component of the justice system, no?

Trogdor_T_Burninator
6
3 months ago

No.

(I don't believe that, just being a contrarian smartass. )

1mikeg
6
3 months ago

Yeah, but until we replace them all with robots, good luck prescribing their existing bias.

PM_ME_A_FACT
5
3 months ago

Yes but these conversations always become anti feminist rants when it has nothing to do with feminism and everything to do with the "women are caretaker" sexist bias". The laws are gender neutral.

GeckoOBac
28
3 months ago

because I said women burn out of the medical field at twice the rate of men and that was most likely because women tend to not prioritize work the same way men tend to do.

That's not enough to call you an incel but it does seem a bit sexist since you don't seem to be taking into account the status quo of women generally needing to ALSO take care of the "house work" and/or kids. "Prioritizing work" is something you can do if you have the support net to keep you up. This is STILL not true in likely the majority of cases.

[deleted]
9
3 months ago

It's a bit sexist that you assume only women are handling house work and/or kids.

Zoruman_1213
9
3 months ago

Aw man it sucks that I work 60+ hours a week with a one hour commute each way because it means I live in a pig sty. Oh wait no I don't, I just prioritize work but clean my house too. I hate the assumption that men don't clean up after themselves and that if a woman enters the picture she cleans up after him like a child. I am a cleaner person and clean things deeper and more often than my girlfriend and work 1.5 to 2 times more hours than her. She helps me when I ask for it but I am definitely the primary house worker despite working as much as I do.

Occamslaser
8
3 months ago

I made no value judgments and directly quoted an article and yet I'm still sexist. I think it's pretty sexist that you rob these hypothetical women of agency. Are you saying they aren't responsible for their own choices?

tokillaworm
5
3 months ago

I must have missed you quoting an article.

Occamslaser
6
3 months ago

I was literally quoting a study by IIRC the AMA.

Wandering_Plasmon
9
3 months ago

Do you have a link?

Bman135
3
3 months ago

Are you putting a conclusion first and applying a reason second? I mean I haven't done any research yet to see if twice as many women burn out but if that is true how do we know the reason is they dont prioritize work? If you have a study or paper about it you can specifically give me I'd be happy to read it but I'll try to find some on my own.

Ho_ho_beri_beri
12
3 months ago

Discusting!

TheRealPixeLink
16
3 months ago

DESGUSTANG

BaconContestXBL
12
3 months ago

Why does somebody not know how to flush a toilet after they’ve had a shet?

thisISbutter517
7
3 months ago

it wasn't me WELL IT WAS FOOKIN ONE A YUZ

NedryOS
7
3 months ago

How uncivilized.

WaterUSmoking
4
3 months ago

fuckin degenerate

octopoddle
3
3 months ago

Well, if it's attached to his body then that means he is constantly touching a penis, so it's no wonder the court hasn't ruled in his favour so far.

Godislate
5
3 months ago

What kind of sick fuck touches his penis in court?

Wabbity77
4
3 months ago

Been there for 8 years. My best attempt to get 50/50 time with my kids did nothing. I see one of them bi-weekly for a few hours. No judge believes in shared anything, this video portrays a mythical view here.

jemsann
3
3 months ago

Don't know if you know this already, but save all the recipes for the children's stuff, just in case it can benefit you

TheQuinnBee
24
3 months ago

My sister is going through this. Both of them are trying to get full custody of their daughter and there is zero argument for why either of them should have it. Neither one lacks a support system, income, or residence. Neither one has a history of abuse. They just want to hurt one another.

It's the single dumbest divorce. They have zero assets they can fight over except their daughter. But the divorce has been going on for 3 years.

neroli66
26
3 months ago

And the daughter is the one they are hurting the most.

TheQuinnBee
8
3 months ago

Pretty much. It doesn't help the grandparents are supporting the cycle of stupidity. She's a sweet girl who doesn't deserve this.

Neghbour
3
3 months ago

How are they supporting it?

TheQuinnBee
7
3 months ago

The grandparents on both sides are wealthy.

Xxjacklexx
11
3 months ago

That’s fantastic. I truly hope he got a decent result.

InformalCriticism
15
3 months ago

it’s good to know there are people out there like this.

Not as many as there should be.

daria_dangerfield
10
3 months ago

She was on the bench of the Family Court for many years. Her books tell a lot of these kind of stories. She’s amazing.

hail_the_cloud
7
3 months ago

Im starting a movement man #Ishouldhavegonetomydad

ktheway
4
3 months ago

I definitely should not have, but I know a few people who absolutely should have. One of my former coworkers had a daughter who was placed with her mom/coworkers ex girlfriend, who was a drug addict. It took cigarette burns on a 3 year old and the coworker getting married (how will a single man be able to take care of a girl!) to be able to take custody of his daughter.

waldo_whiskey
3
3 months ago

What gets me is when mothers say stuff like "I know what best for my child". My wife does that all the time and sometimes I just wanna say, just cause you gave birth doesn't mean you suddenly have a doctorate in child bearing. Sometimes we have to listen to the doctor or daycare teacher. They have a lot more experience in this stuff than we do. I'm just thankful I didn't have to have the antivax conversation with her, that would have led to some serious fights!!

GeoffAO2
4144
3 months ago

If the custody battle is being resolved on Judge Judy I'm going to assume that the outlook is not bright for the future of anyone involved.

PhillyWonken
2532
3 months ago

"Cut the boy in half"

HyruleanHyroe
477
3 months ago

You can have the top part!

SchScabe
257
3 months ago

She is so fucked up that she calls the head the top part.

TooFastTim
61
3 months ago

I just listened to this stand up. But can't remember who it is

Jayrock122
73
3 months ago

John Mulaney!

TooFastTim
27
3 months ago

He's very funny!!

Zaracen
32
3 months ago

Mick Jagger thinks he's not funny!

spiralaalarips
33
3 months ago

"NAWT FUNAAAY!"

Kaladindin
5
3 months ago

I snorted some god damn scotch out of my nose when he is doing the driving bit.

"Calling Tom. NOT FUCKING TOM! NAWT FUNNAY!!!"

spacelincoln
3
3 months ago

The album it is on is actually called The Top Part. Audio only, it’s on Spotify. Same one with the Salt and Pepper Diner.

HurricanesnHendrick
4
3 months ago

John Mulaney

SchScabe
4
3 months ago

John Mulaney

AuburnJunky
13
3 months ago
talcum-x
8
3 months ago

Just shred him and weigh out equal portions for each parent

1mikeg
3
3 months ago

You're gonna lose a lot of a volume through liquid loss with shredding, though. Better ensure that you retain it and then render the final content into a pulp or slurry to then be measured and portioned. Probably gonna need some plastic bins before it's all said and done with.

taskmule
19
3 months ago

“That’s the second-worst case of being halved I’ve ever seen.”

dankstreetboys
4
3 months ago
Taftimus
3
3 months ago

CUT HIM IN HALF, COUNT HIS RINGS.

AMeanCow
156
3 months ago

Yeah this isn’t a shining moment for the abolishment of gender stereotype and progress towards a just and equitable society. This is gonna be one of those situations you hope you don’t end up behind in line at Walmart.

PoloJuice
100
3 months ago

this isn’t a shining moment for the abolishment of gender stereotype and progress towards a just and equitable society

It sort of is. There are a lot of people that respect Judge Judy, having her make a statement like this may change their perception of the issue. Individuals using their powers in the media to make statements is one of the reason gay acceptance spread so quickly, apart from it just being common sense.

CommentCalligraphy
35
3 months ago

Then again, think about who Judge Judy's audience is. Now think about what effect it will have on those people when they see someone who they quite possibly respect and take seriously propagate a progressive message like this.

NomadFire
5
3 months ago

I wouldn't be surprised if this is just fiction. Back in the heyday of these types of shows half of the shows were real the other half were fake. I do believe everyone involved gets paid but if she rules in someone's favor that person gets most of the money.

Something to that, I don't think anything she says is legally binding. It has been a long long time since I read anything about how those shows actually work.

godrestsinreason
21
3 months ago

While there have been similar shows in the past that have been fake, Judge Judy is one of the known real ones. There have been instances in the past where people have gotten together to fake a case so they can share the winnings, but it wasn't known to the producers until much later on.

Wartodas1
6
3 months ago

I've been trying to come up with some reason for my dad and I to "sue" each other and get on Judge Judy. Make sure it's ridiculous and salacious so they'll be interested, then, whatever happens just split the $5k.

earthwormjim91
4
3 months ago

She's smarter than you give her credit for. Others have tried that and gotten caught, and she's dismissed the whole thing with prejudice.

idgetonbutibeenon
4
3 months ago

It’s legally binding. She’s an arbitrator who used to be a judge. The incentive to go on the show is that the show pays the debt that she rewards.

hannes3120
30
3 months ago

Wait? That's a real trial happening there?
We have those law-shows here in Germany, too - but those are purely entertainment with scripted stories and bad actors.

Isn't it also forbidden to film inside of a courthouse?

GeoffAO2
91
3 months ago

Judge Judy is actually a civil arbitrator, if I recall correctly. I believe that all parties involved agree beforehand to abide by her decision. Essentially she dictates the terms of a contractual agreement between the parties.

In a real court of law the judge has to give permission to record the proceedings.

the_honest_liar
18
3 months ago

And the show covers the cost of whatever penalties are decided

QuasarL
27
3 months ago

She is a real former judge. She was awesome. From her wiki:

"She was previously a family court judge for a number of years and did many good things. Sheindlin passed the New York state bar examination in 1965, the same year as her graduation, and was hired as a corporate lawyer for a cosmetics firm.[2] Within two years she became dissatisfied with her job and left to raise her two children. She was made aware of a position in the New York court system as a prosecutor in the family courts.[when?][2] In her role as a lawyer, Sheindlin prosecuted child abuse cases, domestic violence and juvenile crime.[2]

By 1982, Sheindlin's "no-nonsense" attitude inspired New York Mayor Ed Koch to appoint her as a criminal court judge.[2] Four years later, she was promoted to supervising judge in the family court's Manhattan division.[2] She earned a reputation as a "tough" judge (though she has disagreed with the labels "tough" and "harsh"),[10] known for her fast decision-making and acerbic wit.[8]"

zyocuh
20
3 months ago

Just btw, when a judge retires they are still a "judge". I work at a courthouse and once a judge retires you still call them "Judge Smith". They can still be substitute judges, which can pass judgment the same as a normal judge and unless they seriously break the law will always be able to do that.

Wsing1974
5
3 months ago

Judge Judy is small claims court. I doubt they were deciding custody here, this probably came up as a side issue of something else.

sonia72quebec
3
3 months ago

She was a family court Judge for 25 years.

She was on 60 minutes before she got the TV program and it seemed like everyone hated her.

CESDirector
3
3 months ago

This is the 60 minutes story from when she was a family court judge, before she got her tv show

https://youtu.be/XruPCV_gGYo

leparsdon
3
3 months ago

Judge Judy had no authority to rule on, or enforce child custody agreements. I believe the episode in question was dealing with other issues and the subject of the child custody came up and that was her comment.

Cubantragedy
1898
3 months ago

When my cousin had his son years ago, he and his girlfriend split up shortly after. She was a drunk, a drug addict, in and out of jail/rehab, no job, no permanent residence. Meanwhile, he's always kept a steady job with reliable income and stable housing.

He had to fight tooth and nail for years in a custody battle over his son. He is with him now but the default position of family court was to leave the boy with his mother.

Shortly after this she had a premature baby that was born addicted to heroin. She sometimes calls her son while she's fucked up on his "birthday" but it's always the wrong day.

I could go on forever about all the little things she's done but he was never able to deny her contact or visitation rights no matter her behavior.

saxman7890
740
3 months ago

He should have been able to deny her visitation rights though. If the father had been the drug addict you know he’d never have gotten to see his kids.

I_molest_trees
543
3 months ago

If the father had been the drug addict you know he’d never have gotten to see his kids.

Well yeah, because he's a guy.

roadmosttravelled
134
3 months ago

Jake, from State Farm.

sfxer001
47
3 months ago

Uhh, Khakis.

serenwipiti
45
3 months ago

She.Sounds.Hideous.

broly314
19
3 months ago

Well shes a guy, soooo.

Dankbooty69
6
3 months ago

You're just repeating exactly what the guy you responded to was saying

coffee_foxe
50
3 months ago

I work in a supervised child visitation center. It seems rare from what I've seen, at least in my state, that parents are legally denied at least some contact with their children even if it has to be supervised

saxman7890
7
3 months ago

Well I guess I really used the wrong wording. I meant like being able to keep the kid alone. I figure it’d take a heck of a lot to be able to deny supervised visitation especially at a center.

resumehelpacct
24
3 months ago

it's very very hard to lose visitation rights

x_samanthajane
85
3 months ago

This is so horrible, I’m sorry to hear that’s happened. Women aren’t born knowing how to be good parents, I don’t know why it seems to be the default that we make better parents regardless of the circumstances.

-Mr_Rogers_II
52
3 months ago

The only reason is because the mother has to incubate the baby and give birth to it. That’s literally it.

Ccomfo1028
10
3 months ago

Because a patriarchal society has decided that women are caring and loving and soft and maternal and therefore better parents. It's the reason women with children have a hard time getting work.

[deleted]
59
3 months ago

[deleted]

ohwellwhateverNVMind
7
3 months ago

The case still stands: the burden of proof was on the father. Fight tooth and nail. The fact that he had to go through all that is an issue itself.

lildil37
25
3 months ago

These are the types of issues we need equality for as well.

WaterUSmoking
2
3 months ago

He is with him now but the default position of family court was to leave the boy with his mother.

yes. courts rationalize it as being best for the child by calling the deadbeat parent who babysits the most the "primary caretaker"

its despicable.

Bacon_Bitz
3
3 months ago

Usually when a baby is born addicted it is instantly taken and CPS checks on her other kids. That should have given your cousin full custody.

LurkBrowsingtonIII
3
3 months ago

She was a drunk, a drug addict, in and out of jail/rehab, no job, no permanent residence. Meanwhile, he's always kept a steady job with reliable income and stable housing.

He had to fight tooth and nail for years in a custody battle over his son. He is with him now but the default position of family court was to leave the boy with his mother.

This happens frequently, and it isn't just family court that has a strong bias towards the mother. Governmental organizations are just as bad. I've had issues with the CRA (Canada's version of the IRS), with the provincial government and with multiple school divisions.

eggrollsofhope
3
3 months ago

It's an absolute joke that men have to fight tooth and nail to get a fair judgment. You don't see feminist battling equal rights on this issue

canntstopmeow
1034
3 months ago

My ex would only let me see my kids for a few hours once a week with her present after i left. She had no legal basis or right to be keeping me from them. I was going to tske her to court, but she offered mediation instead. It was AMAZING how fast her tune changed once the mediator 'kindly' explained to her how the judge would have torn a mile wide strip off of her and basically just given me everything i wanted.

The reason i didn't take her to court is because no matter what happens i have to deal with this person for the rest of my life. i figured the less bad feelings the easier it would be to co parent.

It worked. Thank fucking god i finally get to see my kids on my own terms starting this month

mcastle734
198
3 months ago

Sorry that happened but congrats!!!!

canntstopmeow
16
3 months ago

Thank you! Its been a long time coming im so happy

db2
11
3 months ago

Don't drop your guard though, in a few months she'll be back to the wrongthink. I'm sorry to say it but chances are very high you'll have to do the court thing, followed by filing contempt on her a few months after that. Be prepared for it.

casinos_not_7-11s
23
3 months ago

100% This. My ex and I are the best of friends. Swapping days, paying for school/ extra curriculars, vacations, and just life with her and the kiddo is super easy. Keep it civil at all costs

vram1974
6
3 months ago

Amazed to hear you got such a positive outcome.

My ex blocked me from seeing the kids. Went to mediation and the mediator didn't say anything was wrong with that.

Now I have a lawyer and it's been 2.5 years and I still only see them twice a week. Nether have ever been allowed to stay overnight with me. I have to drive 130 km.

poenesprod
7
3 months ago

Cangratz brother! Goodluck! Im happy for you :)

Johnnadawearsglasses
839
3 months ago

Say it again, even louder

HE’S THE FATHER. HE HAS AS MUCH RIGHT TO BE A GOOD OR SHITTY PARENT AS YOU DO, BECKY

vizzyq
197
3 months ago

That, my friend, is 100% the face of a Madison.

Johnnadawearsglasses
112
3 months ago

Katelyn is confused why she doesn’t get sole custody of Dakota

Turnbob73
3
3 months ago

I bet you she drives an impala too

Johnnadawearsglasses
18
3 months ago

Becky is Karen’s daughter in law. She ruined Karen’s poor son Bryce’s life.

Vavz101
556
3 months ago

I just wish it was this simple as the power a mother believes she has over you with kids is still unbelievable and the shit I’ve got to go through just to see mine when I haven’t abandoned my children or missed child Maintence is a joke.

saxman7890
321
3 months ago

My mother just up and took me and my sister to another state. And my dad couldn’t afford to sue for custody without becoming bankrupt and homeless. So he had to let us go because at least he could take care of us through child support. As soon as I was old enough to make my own decision about what parent I lived with I moved back with my dad. It really is a fucked up world

Stubby_gooner
185
3 months ago

I hate Your mother. Can you please let her know that

PM-Me-YourBoobies
73
3 months ago

Same. Fuck her, and not in a nice way.

TopShelfPrivilege
69
3 months ago

Don't worry, if the kids on Xbox live are to be believed they're performing unspeakable sex acts on her as we speak.

GothamBrawler
20
3 months ago

Can confirm. My mother was railed by eight 12year olds, just last night.

SalsaRice
65
3 months ago

This. Most kidnapping cases are simply one parent or relative taking a kid.

DaySlayerWI
24
3 months ago

There was an Amber Alert not long ago where the news articles completely disregarded the fact the kidnapper was the childs father.

haltested
13
3 months ago

to be fair, the majority of kidnappings are by parents who don't have legal custody rights, and unless we're thinking of different ones, the Amber alert I'm thinking about ended up with the little girl dead and the alert was because he didn't bring her back on time.

my sister was 'kidnapped' by her biological father for two weeks, but it's still kidnapping because he wasn't supposed to have her.

[deleted]
4
3 months ago

Because he didn't have custody. If you're a parent and have legal rights to your kid, as in no parenting plan court order saying you have X days to see them, you can take your kid anywhere you want, regardless of the other persons protest.

manfon
6
3 months ago

When you were away from your father did you keep regular contact with him like over the phone?

saxman7890
6
3 months ago

Oh yeah I was able to maintain contact.

Farmieee
3
3 months ago

If I saw your mother in the street I would punch her in the face

ThePurpleComyn
3
3 months ago

I have a friend who went through this. The kids mother just decided to move to a different state. He filed his protest with the state they left, and in less than a year he was granted full custody. Things are slowly changing.

PDXGrizz
3
3 months ago

I am a father and my daughter was taken from Oregon to NY by the mother when she was 7 months old, without any warning and I couldn't move to NY because I have no support system there. Now I'm paying child support and am hoping my daughter has the same path as yours. I hardly get to see my baby, but when I do she loves interacting with me on cam. Being the father in this situation sucks, just know your dad thought about you all the time.

bebeslo
3
3 months ago

Couldn’t your dad have had her arrested for kidnapping? I’ve seen it done when one parent leaves the state with the kid.

saxman7890
3
3 months ago

I’m not sure if that was an option. I came home on my Last day of school to our whole house packed and we went. But I did spend half the summer with him so I’m not sure if it qualifies? When they got the divorce she got the house and since he was living out of a cabin we’d built several years earlier that didn’t have power yet we stayed with my mom. So I’m guessing it was some sort of abuse of the current custody agreement?

Ess2s2
3
3 months ago

Almost verbatim what happened between myself and my ex. She took them out of state and I had the option of chasing her down or keeping the best job I'd ever had.

I got a lawyer, let my company know what was up, and worked my ass off while I paid support and took every weekend I could with the kids. I named my mom as joint conservator and so her spending time with the kids was good when I couldn't be there.

Finally, my company found me a position near my kids about 5 years later. The difference between my ex's house and mine is night and day, and all the kids have since independently chosen to live with me. The ex would lie and tell them they were getting a new house "any day now" in an effort to keep the kids from asking to live with me, and the levee finally broke when she told my teenage daughter and youngest son that I didn't want them to live with me. My daughter immediately called bullshit on her mom (I'd been telling them since I'd moved back that I would always welcome them in my (their) house).

Word through the grapevine is that she went and talked to a legal advocate about it, who basically told her if she didn't respect the kids' wishes, I'd drag her into court and win handily.

buddamus
31
3 months ago

I have been battling my ex for 13 years. Good luck and never lose hope

Vavz101
8
3 months ago

And I bet you get told your not the reasonable one, even if you have moved on and leave her alone to live her life like I do with my ex, and yet now I’m living my life and again still being a good dad I’m the bad guy when she decides it’s time for her to be a bitch and she’s chipped a toe nail. Stay strong yourself, one day we will have equal rights you know like what women are fighting for.

buddamus
12
3 months ago

My daughter is a teenager now and my ex is rapidly loosing control. I always have been the reasonable one and my daughter is seeing that herself. And when she decides to live with me I will make sure she keeps contact with her mother because I am better than her

DemiGoddess001
18
3 months ago

It largely depends on the judge. In my parents case my mom had to move out because the house was in my dad’s name. That doesn’t mean my mom didn’t try though.

The sucky thing about the custody in my case though is that my parents have never lived more than 20 min away from each other and I went to a private school. My Dad was injured in a work place accident so he was allowed to keep the lawsuit money (which was not very much sadly) but he gave half to my mom so she could buy a house. Then he had to pay more child support than some of my friends dads who had more children and I only got to see him on Thursday’s, every other weekend, and July because I might start my period and I should be with my mother more because I’m a girl despite the fact that my father was retired.

The judge was biased. At the time she had just gotten married to her 8th husband and she had been divorced 7 times.

On the plus side it’s much better now. My guy friend became the main custodial parent because he had a stable well paying job and she was living with her parents because she had no income and was mentally unwell at the time. He’s a great dad and it was the best decision. Now they share custody because her mental well being is much better.

LegalDeer
9
3 months ago

My partner is currently in this situation, his ex won't let him see his son despite the fact that he has done everything to support him. It's sad, and it hurts me to see how much it hurts him and not being able to help.

Feitidede
333
3 months ago

Karen 0 - Constitution 1

Camminatore
128
3 months ago

Fuck you Karen

CrazyMiltos
74
3 months ago
PrpleMnkyDshwsher
12
3 months ago

Look at that face at the first frame of the video.

1000000% a Karen.

Qaeta
145
3 months ago

"Oh, giving mom the day off are we?"

Makes me want to cunt punch every fucking person who says that, or some variation of that implying that fathers are somehow not just as good at taking care of kids as mothers.

tinytom08
126
3 months ago

"Oh, giving mom the day off are we?"

My favourite is "Do you know the man you're with?"

I'm not a father, but I've got a sister who is significantly younger than me and is currently 5 years old, about once every 2-5 months somebody will pretty much accuse me of kidnapping her by asking a question like that.

I get it, you want the kid to be safe, but why the fuck would I be queued up at the IceCream van holding her hand if I just kidnapped her? Common fucking sense.

Worst part is, she's a very, very shy girl and one time someone asked her in an aggressive manner, to which my sister replied "I want my mummy." and the woman grabbed her fucking arm and tried dragging her.

Do you know how hard it is to explain that you're not kidnapping a child while battling a middle aged woman in a tug of war with the child? It's not fucking easy.

Qaeta
82
3 months ago

IMHO, dropping the woman with a punch should be justified, since she was basically trying to kidnap your sister.

MowMdown
50
3 months ago

Truthfully, since kidnapping is a felony in most states, the use of deadly force is often legally justified in the case of preventing a felony such as kidnapping.

Yes, you can legally shoot someone attempting to kidnap your children in most states.

Edit: im not saying you should but you can if it’s necessary.

abeazacha
3
3 months ago

About the edit: idk, sounds like we should to be honest. The amount of crazy people trying to kidnap kids for sexist or racist reasons...

DOAisBetter
4
3 months ago

Eh I wish it would just confirm to everyone you are kid napping the child even if you are not. Basically if you are a woman you are free to kidnap any child who is with their father without the mother present. Think about how scary that is, the only way to stop it is to basically put up a fight to stop the woman which in tern will get police called the woman will be gently taken aside with the kid while you will be lucky if you are not tackled or handcuffed.

I am a dad and luckily I’ve never been through that, my daughter is rather shy around strangers so I can only hope she would identify me immediately but at times she does ask for her mom or use mom and dad interchangeable with both of us and as we can see here that can get you the dad in trouble.

XenonNade
5
3 months ago

" I get it, you want the kid to be safe, but why the fuck would I be queued up at the IceCream van holding her hand if I just kidnapped her? Common fucking sense."

It's cause hiding in plain sight lmao /s/s/s

Cheeriomartinez
3
3 months ago

Bro!! I feel you! My daughter is 10 now and she's light skin just like her mom and I'm tan as heck. But the looks I would get when pushing her stroller along oooh man.

Cheeriomartinez
66
3 months ago

I get so irritated when I watch a movie and this dumbass dad is wearing a gas mask rubber gloves an apron just to change a diaper. It's like dude you probably eat a girl's ass hole. Stop being so extra and just change the diaper

CactusUpYourAss
22
3 months ago

There is a huge difference between eating a cleaned ass and cleaning up diarhea.

But Yeah its over the top, agreed

miklovesrum
13
3 months ago

Username... kind of checks out?

sroomek
5
3 months ago

Well yeah, you don’t want to get an infection.

WelpImAroused
3
3 months ago

They're supposed to be cleaned?

db2
18
3 months ago

"Oh, dad's babysitting!" No you fucking shithead, dad's being a parent.

WalterWhitesHairLine
9
3 months ago

I completely agree. I don’t tolerate it. If my husband has the baby, he’s parenting. Same as if I had the baby. It’s not babysitting or giving me a break- it’s doing his job like I do mine for the little human we brought into the world.

Fathers may have less to do with the physical development of the child, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t responsible or capable. It just ticks me off that people like to pretend it’s the other way around.

BrianPurkiss
10
3 months ago

I’m not a parent - but my wife and I plan on having kids in the future.

I look forward to the day when someone says that to me so I can reply, “no - I’m being an involved father.”

SethRogen-Not
6
3 months ago

I HATE that shit. My wife travels out of the country for work on extended trips a few times a year. Every single time, I get questions from people about how I’m holding up or what will my daughter eat. Believe it or not, despite the fact that I have a penis, I am fully capable of caring for my child without my wife present.

Karminarina
19
3 months ago

My dad took custody of me and my two sisters when they split. It basically came down to him taking all the debt as long as he could have us kids, no court needed, and she accepted. I’ve seen her several times in my life, and that was enough. Go dads!

theQuandary
6
3 months ago

The only state I've ever seen child support statistics from was California (I don't think they release them anymore). Those showed that only a small percentage of fathers are "deadbeats" and almost all of those were waaayy below the poverty line. On the other hand, the majority of women ordered to pay child support didn't pay regardless of income.

If a father doesn't pay, he goes straight to jail. If a mother doesn't pay, she's extremely unlikely to go to jail and even continues to get visitation rights in most states.

Finally, being raised by a single mother is close to the worst thing that can happen to a child. 85% of people behind bars had no father in their life. Children raised by a single mother are also much more likely to have mental and emotional issues, to be behind in education (both high-school graduation and going to college), and to grow up impoverished and stay impoverished the rest of their life. Single mothers themselves are also much more likely to have emotional and mental health problems.

On the other hand, these issues basically do not exist for single fathers. I suspect there are two reasons. First, a father generally has to be par-excellent to get custody in the first place. Second, finding a male role-model for your kids is very hard these days. There's basically no male teachers until high-school because men don't want the risk of being falsely accused and having their lives destroyed (men made up close to half of teachers once upon a time). For the same reason, few men care to step up for other people's kids. On the flip side, everyone seems to trust women. A single father can find role-models for their kids everywhere -- the only difficulty is often finding a good one.

That's not to say being a single father is easy. The entire rest of the social deck is stacked against single fathers. You're often looked down on and viewed as second-rate (not to mention the abuser stigma when out in public).

Society needs more appreciation for fathers in general and single-fathers in particular.

russianlastname
6
3 months ago

i agree!! i’m a woman and i’ve seen terrible mothers in my lifetime. society makes it seem like all women have this ~ motherly instinct ~ that just switches on after they have a baby, and for some that may be true, but for others...not so much.

either parent can be a good or bad parent regardless of gender, if they want to be a good parent, they can

jamesongineer
3
3 months ago

You did say dumb twice in the same sentence.

Cheeriomartinez
5
3 months ago

I should have stuck with dumberer.

jamesongineer
3
3 months ago

Lol, I had too. Single father here too. Got my daughter for 3 weeks instead of 6 this summer because ex “scheduled activities for her in July”. $20K in legal for me to dispute it. #coloradoMenR2ndClass

mare07
287
3 months ago

Why is custody of kids not automatically 50/50?

Nobolos
328
3 months ago

Nobody wants half a kid

canntstopmeow
104
3 months ago

Tell that to Solomon

iNNeRKaoS
27
3 months ago

Solomon didn't want half a baby though. He wanted to see which person actually cared for the baby, to determine the true mother.

Monic_maker
15
3 months ago

Thank you. People really miss the point of his request

narms13
15
3 months ago

I'll have the top half!

marth141
17
3 months ago

A lady so f%@#ed up that she says, "Yeah sure, I'll get what I can get. I'll take the top part."

-whycantistop-
5
3 months ago

You only get the foreskin

Crossdice
3
3 months ago

Well that is the best part.

PKMNTrainerMark
3
3 months ago

Oh, he knew.

AncileBooster
3
3 months ago

Little known fact is that that was the first Capcha ever invented. He successfully found the bot while allowing the human to access the child.

mod1fier
11
3 months ago

.25 isn't enough, and frankly half is way too much.

VinnieMatch69
64
3 months ago

because, due to school days, the kid(s) need to be with one parent about 75% of the time. I.E. M-F so they can attend the school they're currently going to, ideally. It would not be favorable for the kids to be with mom on MWF and Dad TuTh and shared weekends. So one parent usually gets Primary Custody.

Shared Legal Custody is usually the case though.

MartianDirt
22
3 months ago

As someone whose parents did essentially a 4 day split then swap - it’s fucking terrible.

Maybe some people adjust easier, but I know me and my siblings had a horrible time with it even though the houses were only a ten minute drive apart. We had to remember to bring two backpacks to school with nowhere to store the second (high school lockers were tiny). If we forgot a single thing, we were not able to go to the other parents house to get it. I could most leave the “at home textbooks” at home because sometimes I needed them at dads and sometimes I needed them at moms. One house had a family computer, the other had two - so the amount of time I had for homework varied.

It completely fucks with any idea of a routine. Kids sometimes don’t remember that they have a game/concert/club meeting on Thursday when it’s Monday.

I only had to deal with it for two years, but my grades and mental health suffered. My next youngest sibling ended up getting so stressed she was self harming and has had to battle major depressive issues. After five years and a school representative advocating, we finally got our parents change the split agreement to be less “convenient” for them, and actually think about the burden on us.

jennerality
12
3 months ago

People are approaching the issue as if children are assets needing to be split. Any sort of 50/50 split in a regular weekly/monthly type cadence is disruptive and it would be the exception, not the rule for it to work out in the children's favor.

reshp2
4
3 months ago

Why can't the other parent do school drop off and pick up part of the week?

baalroo
8
3 months ago

My kid's biological father lives on the opposite side of the city and doesn't have a car. He would have no way to take the kids to school.

ComebacKids
16
3 months ago

As a kid from divorced parents that both loved me, this would’ve been a terrible solution.

It was confusing enough spending 25% of my time at a different household with different (step) siblings, different house rules, different neighborhood (so different kids to play with), different part of town so having friends over from my part of town was difficult, different room with a different set of clothes, different dinner times (5pm vs 7pm), and so on.

I can’t even imagine transitioning between these two completely different lifestyles 50% of the time.

Tak7ics
5
3 months ago

My brother has a situation where the house went to the kids and it's mom and dad that move in and out

kjeike
3
3 months ago

I have three friends who have done this their whole life and enjoy it. For them, the hardest bit was moving their graphics card between the houses or deciding which clothes need to be in which house, or occasionally forgetting homework in the other house. It works for all three of them, and it obviously isn’t for everyone (im a kid of divorced parents living on different continents), but for people who want to see their parents equally, the sacrifices are worth it.

jthomas694
7
3 months ago

That's difficult as well. Then they both have to live in the same school zone, and even if they do it's difficult to have a kid move once a week. It is a little different to tell someone you stay somewhere else on certain weekends than it is to say you change where you live every week. Stability is important and it's about what's in the best interest of the child. This is part of why divorce/having children out of wedlock is a bad thing. It's not politically correct but it's true that the best situation for children is a household where Mom and Dad are together in a healthy relationship. Sometimes divorce is the right answer but no matter what it will have consequences that negatively impact the family.

Durantye
48
3 months ago

To play devil's advocate in this situation 50/50 custody is fucking awful for the kid in most situations (unless the parents absolutely bust their ass to make it easy on the kid, or are filthy rich enough where they can just make it easy with money). Imagine having to move twice a year, sometimes to different school zones, different neighborhoods with different friends, different family you live with all together, in some extreme cases entirely different areas completely separated from your 'other life'. The law takes into account what is best for the kid, parent's rights come second to the child's. That is why I think visitation rights are generally the best outcome even if it is often an unfair ruling. But it shouldn't be based on gender at all.

15blairm
6
3 months ago

Either outcome is really terrible for the kid.

Full custody to the mother means whatever sons she has have to grow up without a father figure while also having societies expecting these boys to be able to fill that role without ever having an example on how to do so.

Same situation for a single father with full custody and his daughters.

50/50 the kids have to play musical chairs and like you said that only works out if the parents both bust their asses

[deleted]
4
3 months ago

The only outcome that actually works for the kid is when both parents live in the same town. That way even if mom has fully custody, the kid can still see dad all the time without having to pack a damn suitcase. Dad can still be at ballgames and dance recitals and parent/teacher conferences and doctors appointments.

Unfortunately most divorces go sour and people act like assholes or they are selfish and don't choose the child's stability over their own wants and needs.

Aging_Shower
5
3 months ago

Don't most divorced parents try to stay in the same city? My parents lived like 30 minutes away from each other so I could switch each week. Still wasn't easy but still.

If the parents need to live in different cities it makes sense for one of them to get the custody.

Hereforpowerwashing
3
3 months ago

Usually the custody agreement stipulates that they stay in state.

Hereforpowerwashing
5
3 months ago

Twice a year? We had a friend growing up who came to school every other week, and went to a different district the rest of the time. His parents kept that arrangement until he was in 7th grade. His dad was an attorney who owned his house and his mom was a drug addict who kept moving 2 or 3 times a year, and mom had 50% custody until he was in high school. The only reason he started coming to our school full time in 7th grade was his older brother turned 16 and drove them 45 minutes the weeks they were with Mom.

NothappyJane
10
3 months ago

If this is a serious question, practicalities and bias.

Usually a kid has a house and.a life and the parents have to work together to make sure all things that go into a kids life like daycare, school, breastfeeding for small babies, medicines, sports, extra curricular are actually happening. it's actually assumed whomever was doing most of that before will do it post seperation and the parents need to come to some agreement and work all that out.

There's no automatic assumption that parents live close to each other, have the right attitudes, and actually are willing to co parent, you gotta establish a belief to a judge that this arrangement would actually work for the child. You gotta know that a kid is getting picked up, going to school, getting proper care, etc before a set of orders are stamped and women who are often primary caregivers prior to seperation are in the best position to keep doing caretaking

barrinmw
10
3 months ago

It is. The vast majority of divorces end with shared custody. What often happens when it doesnt end that way is that the mother will sue for full custody and the father chooses not to fight it.

ItsLoudB
8
3 months ago

That is SO not as simple as you make it sound like.

Ferbtastic
15
3 months ago

My wife was a divorce/family attorney in Florida for several years. Her experience is just as described above. 50/50 custody is the default. 99% of he time when mom got full custody it’s because the dad didn’t show up to court.

[deleted]
5
3 months ago

And the occasional evidence gathered or fabricated to make the other parent look like shit.

viajake
263
3 months ago

Another reason why we need the Equal Rights Amendment to become law.

bookluvr83
179
3 months ago

It's almost like equality benefits EVERYONE

Otrada
17
3 months ago

Isn't the point of equality that the law isn't made in a way to benefit one group more then the other? so then technically speaking it doesn't benefit anyone. but there is no [opposite of a benefit] (sry don't know the word, not a native speaker) for anyone either. making ot the fairest way. but the problem is that some people will lose something while others will gain something when it gets implemented. so it allways feels unfair at the start.

bookluvr83
67
3 months ago

There's a saying "When you're used to privilege, equality feels like oppression" Equal rights are good for everyone, but the people who have benefited most from inequality aren't going to think so.

frausting
14
3 months ago

Sad truth right there

kbox
12
3 months ago

There’s another saying “if we can get the poor fighting amongst themselves based on how they look they won’t bother the rich”.

The3DMan
9
3 months ago

The privileged don’t actually lose anything. They’re just pissed off that their “lessers” get to have the same benefits, making their benefits no longer exclusive.

BannanasAreEvil
6
3 months ago

And some never even know they have more rights or privilege because it's never been contested. This law would open many eyes in society to those who know they are not treated equally and to those who dont realize they are treated better than others.

TheCrimsonNurple
10
3 months ago

Isn't the point of equality that the law isn't made in a way to benefit one group more then the other? so then technically speaking it doesn't benefit anyone.

I think you're confusing "benefit" with "give an advantage to".

Rights absolutely benefit everyone.

viajake
7
3 months ago

"The 14th Amendment was ratified in 1868, after the Civil War, to deal with race discrimination. In referring to the electorate, it added the word "male" to the Constitution for the first time. Even with the 14th Amendment in the Constitution, women had to fight a long and hard political battle over more than 70 years to have their right to vote guaranteed through the 19th Amendment in 1920.

It was not until 1971, in Reed v. Reed, that the Supreme Court applied the 14th Amendment for the first time to prohibit sex discrimination. However, in Reed and subsequent decisions (e.g., Craig v. Boren, 1976; United States v. Commonwealth of Virginia, 1996), the Court declined to elevate sex discrimination claims to the strict scrutiny standard of review that the 14th Amendment requires for the suspect classifications of race, religion, and national origin. Discrimination based on those categories must bear a necessary relation to a compelling state interest in order to be upheld as constitutional.

The Court now applies heightened (so-called “skeptical”) scrutiny in cases of sex discrimination and requires extremely persuasive evidence to uphold a government action that differentiates on the basis of sex. However, the intermediate standard of review for such claims requires only that such classifications must substantially advance an important governmental objective. The ERA would require courts to go beyond the current application of the 14th Amendment by adding sex to the list of suspect classifications protected by the highest level of strict judicial scrutiny.

In an interview reported in the January 2011 California Lawyer, the late Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia disregarded 40 years of 14th-Amendment precedent when he stated that the Constitution does not protect against sex discrimination. This remark has been cited as clear evidence of the need for an Equal Rights Amendment to guarantee that all judges, regardless of their judicial or political philosophy, will interpret the Constitution to prohibit sex discrimination."

via www.equalrightsamendment.org

vram1974
45
3 months ago

I was presented with something similar but we haven't gone to court. She just randomly picked Wednesdays and Saturdays and sometimes only let me see my kids for a half hour. It really was like being in prison.

[deleted]
26
3 months ago

If this isn’t court ordered, you do not have to follow her schedule. If you want to keep your kid for longer, then you are legally allowed

Edit: I am not a lawyer, but this is true in 100% of the US

-worryaboutyourself-
3
3 months ago

And if she calls the cops on him to try and get her kids back, they will tell her it’s s civil matter and to take it to court.

Source: I work at a sheriffs office.

dustbuddii
174
3 months ago

https://youtu.be/Tpy8NMonHE0

Video clip with audio

Fartmatic
109
3 months ago

Thankyou. When I'm President of Earth I'm going to make gifs that should be videos illegal.

SSDGM24
27
3 months ago

You will have my vote. They make me want to throw something.

Gespuis
3
3 months ago

Don’t throw your phone, it’s expensive.

dustbuddii
6
3 months ago

Yeah not sure why i had to look it up myself. Reddit isn't what it used to be.

MyPoopStinksBad
15
3 months ago

Thank you.

Idky people post videos without sound.

neverforgeddit
5
3 months ago

Even better.

GigaMight
138
3 months ago

Courtroom Karen

ting_bu_dong
28
3 months ago

Marky got with Karen / And Karen got Judy / She wasn't sharing Karen's outlook / On the topic of custody

FallacyDescriber
11
3 months ago

I don't mind the meme sometimes, the images it shows

SmokemBear
4
3 months ago

Karen never knew just how she’ll look through Judge Judy’s eyes

[deleted]
94
3 months ago

That all depends. What's the context? Some parents should lose the right to parent. There's too much parent advocacy in many of the courts and not enough child advocacy

deanosaurus_chenz
147
3 months ago

Yeah but parents should only lose the right to parent because they've been shitty parents, not because they are a particular gender.

Leprecon
34
3 months ago

Its not like this gif is particularly forthcoming with all the details of this specific case.

krarkmetzinger
20
3 months ago

It’s almost like this gif tells a tiny part of the story in order to push the buttons of every aggrieved guy in here who got fucked by the courts. Then they can rant about exactly how badly they got screwed over, and no one wins, because the gif doesn’t tell a story, it hints at one - and the story it hints at is vague enough for everyone to use their personal experiences to assume what happened here.

Knopes
6
3 months ago

Wouldn't it be fair to assume that, if the judge chose to give this speech about the father deserving equal custody she has gone over the case and the evidence and made an objective decision? It's not like she would rule in favor of the father if there was history of violence or something similar that would make him unfit to be a parent.

krarkmetzinger
4
3 months ago

I'm actually happy you brought this up, because the judge is not an actual judge, she's a TV entertainer and arbitrator:

http://mentalfloss.com/article/29829/what-legal-authority-does-judge-judy-have

So that brings up two points:

  1. Is her duty to a legal authority and coming from a legal responsibility, or is her duty to increase ratings and entertainment value?

  2. Have you ever in your life seen a judge make a bad decision because of their own personal biases and desires?

Abuse would not be handled at this level. This is small claims court. I'm trying desperately to provide some context that this clip clearly doesn't provide, but what I did find is a series of 1:15 long YouTube videos where it sounds like they lived in the same house, he got mad (about what, who knows) and left, and tried to take their daughter with him. That's where the dispute arose. We know nothing without more context, but isn't it at all plausible that a huge argument occurred and she didn't want an angry man with their daughter? I don't know the context, but this certainly doesn't seem to be a "we're not allowing a court ordered visitation" situation - and I'm especially suspicious because this clip made its rounds on the internet from a bunch of Men's Rights groups, also devoid of context. That's all.

FishoD
24
3 months ago

What context do you need? In general when it comes to custody battles the mother has much bigger advantage and much bigger chance of getting custody of the children. Men/Fathers have tremendous disadvantage here. That's what Judge Judy is saying and clearly the Mother was told she will get the custody of their kids over the father because she is a woman and that's it.

Shantotto5
4
3 months ago

And reddit loves this angle, because mensrights and shit. Because men are really disadvantaged here and the only reason they don't make up the vast majority of single parents is because of how biased the system is against them. Any time I see shit like this upvoted it just reminds me of how profoundly sexist this site is and how most users seem completely oblivious to it.

codepoet
21
3 months ago

Stabbing is, indeed, generally frowned upon in family court.

POCKALEELEE
6
3 months ago

It was much better than the alternative - she tried to press a hot iron on my face. She had postpartum psychosis and was literally crazy. Refused help, and I couldn't raise my child in that environment.

FatBoyStew
3
3 months ago

You missed an opportunity to raise the greatest dodgeball player this world has ever seen. If you dodge a knife and a hot iron, you can dodge a ball!

In all seriousness, glad you got that shit sorted out.

[deleted]
9
3 months ago

[deleted]

asianabsinthe
67
3 months ago

Of course I've seen both sides fail at parenting, but I SMH when I see the mom win custody just so she can get the child support, spend it on frivolous merchandise and vacations (without the kid), then complain she doesn't have money.

Gouranga56
49
3 months ago

This. Have a friend who actually pays MORE for child support than he is mandated because he wants his kid to have the best shot he can have. Mom won't take him to the doctor, the dentist, kid is always hurt a few of them VERY suspiciously. She makes the 5 yr old clean up after her, do her laundry, etc. Brings in countless men for her one night stands and leaves him alone to hear what is going on in her room. Had one of the guys move in whos older kid actually broke the kids arm for fun...again, nothing. Even DSS did squat.

Court favors her though and he is fighting on up hill battle to try to get custody despite continual neglect from the mom. Even with numerous counselors (yeah the 5 yr old has a counselor) and a psychologist testifying to the neglect the mother gives, and even more evidence (drug use, etc) from the mother, she's the mother, so short of trying to outright murder the kid, the courts do nothing.

Got to love some of these rural areas...when they finally do something right for the kid, it will be far too late.

goofyboots0722
18
3 months ago

That is seriously fucked up. But I believe it. My husband's brother tried to win sole custody because the mom refuses to treat her bipolar disorder. She made her daughter play soccer with a broken foot. I don't understand why logic completely flies out the window with custody hearings.

NetSage
3
3 months ago

What kids team even let a kid with a broken foot on the field?

Wsing1974
17
3 months ago

Alimony is for the spouse. It's supposed to help make up for time spent out of the workforce. Child support is for the children.

Drachen1065
6
3 months ago

Alimony is also taxable income. Child support is not.

specklepop
5
3 months ago

Depending on the ages of the children I think one parent should be able to stay at home with them. It's hardly sitting at home doing nothing

codepoet
5
3 months ago

Bud, you don’t know the half of it. Sigh.

Zambeeni
3
3 months ago

My daughter's mother lives several states away, and I can't uproot my wife from her family to follow, so I only have my daughter for the summer. That's 25% of the year she's with me, but I'm still required to pay my $600 a month support to her mom while I'm the one taking care of her. Feels real good watching that money fly out the window and directly into her drug habit.

And when my daughter heads off to college and neither of us are spending our time or money to raise her because she's away from home? Perfect, 4 years of that woman stealing from her daughter and calling me the asshole.

Super cool, perfect system, love it.

AMeanCow
9
3 months ago

How often do you actually see this? I mean, parenting is hard work and a majority of parents, single or otherwise, sacrifice a lot and do their best at it. There are a lot of shit parents, yes, but this stereotype you’re citing is in no way the norm for single parents and child support cases.

vangoughwasaboss
3
3 months ago

but I SMH when I see the mom win custody just so she can get the child support, spend it on frivolous merchandise and vacations (without the kid), then complain she doesn't have money.

this to me is the most insane part of the whole thing. That they have free reign to do w/e they want with the money, it's just the father dropping cash into the mother's account with no strings. Like what the fuck....

JumpMasterFresh
48
3 months ago

Thanks I needed to see this. Gives me hope I'll see my daughter one day.

JohnBayani
9
3 months ago

I hope too.

supified
44
3 months ago

She's not a judge, she's an arbitrator. There is a big difference between these two things, chief amongst them, the law really has nothing to do with what she's doing. Arbitration is more or less a contract as I understand, to go along with the decision made. So really the court and the gown is all drama and everything she says may simply be opinion.

Denaius
43
3 months ago

She was a judge though - family court in Manhattan, so most of what she says is generally rooted in actual law. On the show though yes, of course you are right she is acting as an arbitrator.

supified
6
3 months ago

Great info, thanks.

bloqs
14
3 months ago

this is correct, what she says goes, because to go on that show they have already signed a contract saying so

klakes1817
7
3 months ago

She is a retired judge from NY.

Arkal
6
3 months ago

Arbitration can be based on law or not

supified
3
3 months ago

Well.. Sure, but I think that's a hard distinction between something that is based on law (the legal system) and where law is optional (arbitration).

[deleted]
37
3 months ago

[deleted]

AmadeusSanctus
3
3 months ago

did you mean more than %90 of parents who are either divorced or split up (married on paper) .

[deleted]
5
3 months ago

[deleted]

AmadeusSanctus
3
3 months ago

There never will be a reason to weaponize your kid and there are so many people who are doing it saying %+90 is a understatement (at least where I live) .

jimbob465
33
3 months ago

I was the child that my dad got full custody of me when I was 2. Completely correct decision by the courts. My dad has become extremely successful and and amazing person. My mom has been a terrible person her entire life. She still lives with her 80+ year old parents. Sometimes we can win.

shanghainese88
35
3 months ago

Knowing some of my friends marriage dynamics. If fathers truly get equal custody upon divorce there would be a tsunami of divorces in the United States.

[deleted]
16
3 months ago

[deleted]

shanghainese88
3
3 months ago

Thank you for your service. Your kids will understand once they grow up. Everything will be better now.

jasonthevii
12
3 months ago

That is sad

UrDeAdPuPpYbOnEr
27
3 months ago

I heard she blows her nose with $100 bills during the commercial breaks. I don’t care though I love that woman.

slothsandmoresloths
8
3 months ago

Why did I picture Judge Judy snortin a fat line through a rolled Benjamin

yourunclejoe
3
3 months ago

because she does that

Judge Judy goes HARD

ZLegacy
28
3 months ago

Buddy and myself going through this. My divorce degree states we have 50/50, neither is to move a certain distance away without notice, and that current contact info is maintained at all times. she split out of state with no notice, no new contact info, etc. haven't seen kids in about 3 years. she did this prior to the divorce as well, seems she showed back up just to get the paperwork done. no idea what the hell I can do, everyone I call is useless.

People who do this are horrible rotten people.

sevendaysky
24
3 months ago

Have you tried calling the court in which the divorce was executed? They may want to know about contempt of court orders because... yeah she broke all of that.

ZLegacy
7
3 months ago

No, I keep getting directed to lawyers, and I'd rather not make it an issue that big. I already know she's planted crazy stories in the kids heads, and I feel like if it comes to arrest or forceful removing of the kids from her it may make them think she was right. I've been considering if I shouldn't just wait and hope they find me when they're of age, but maybe then they would have spitefyl feelings. I dunno...

sevendaysky
6
3 months ago

I commented elsewhere but I'll repeat it for you.

Had a situation like this with my cousins. The father had to move out of state for work, and was supposed to have extended summer visitation as well as weekend calls, plus was supposed to pay child support etc. The mom told my cousins that Dad kept trying to get out of it, wouldn't fly them to see him/wouldn't fly there, wouldn't pay support, etc. She even told them a couple times that Dad specifically told her to send the kids to grandma's instead (next door to me); birthday/Christmas cards and presents were inconsistent and sometimes sucked. They weren't too happy about the whole thing, thought Dad was horrible. When the oldest hit 18, she got contacted by her dad's brother -- long story short, Mom was lying about the whole thing. Many cards/presents were intercepted and co-opted or returned by the mom, and she WAS being paid the whole time. She found a lot of reasons to not let him see the kids -- sick, "vacation to cool spot that never actually happened so they can't go to see you", refusing to give an address so he couldn't come see them -- and so on. All the kids are grown now. The two oldest promptly moved out. One has a decent relationship with him, the other off-and-on, the youngest still lives with Mom and had kids at 15 and 17 and refuses to speak to Dad. The dad said he never tried to go back to court to enforce it for the same reasons you did.

UncleFupa
4
3 months ago

It needed to be made a big issue three years ago. If you ever talk to the right person now, they are going to wonder why you b waited three years.. because if you actually cared, you would have made it a big deal right away.

TeslasAndComicbooks
3
3 months ago

That could literally be considered kidnapping. Especially against a court order.

WalkingDad909
24
3 months ago

I'm lucky my ex kept her crazy out of raising our child together. Shes a great mom though.

Wsing1974
3
3 months ago

Yes, that is lucky.

canntstopmeow
4
3 months ago

Are you me?

My ex is also a decent mother, but my god is she wack

Scum-Mo
20
3 months ago

why would you say something so uncontroversial yet so brave?

warnerrr
21
3 months ago

We not gonna talk about the fact that this account is new and has spammed 43 posts in the last 15 hours?

topcatthomas
5
3 months ago

Yeah and got 50k karma.

karenbradshaw85xox
19
3 months ago

I have three kids by my ex husband who hasn’t bothered or wanted to see them since 2011. I would do anything for them to have a relationship with their father. Makes me sick when women play God like that 😡😡

db2
8
3 months ago

A Karen that's good? You sure you don't live in a volcano lair or something?

All you can do is leave that door open, you can't make him go through it. I'll never understand how someone could walk off on their own kids.

karenbradshaw85xox
3
3 months ago

Yes we are out there 😂 Thank you. Yes the door is always open. I don’t understand it either. The mind baffles

Cayderent
19
3 months ago
irr1449
17
3 months ago

I'm a divorce attorney and about 95% of my clients are men. Nine times out of ten the mother is in a better position to take care of the child. Generally, the mother has been the primary caretaker. I know a lot of good dads that change diapers, and are very present in their children's lives but mom still most of the child-rearing.

Second, more often than not Dad makes more money than Mom. If the kids are under 10-12 mom usually has a job that allows her to provide childcare in the afternoons. Unless mom makes more than it cost to provide childcare than it really isn't worth it for Mom to work. This isn't a male/female income gap it's just that Mom has most likely only had a limited schedule due to having to take care of the children.

The goal is always to give the parents 50/50 parenting time if they can both handle it. Many times they can't and often it's the man because he is working 40-50 hours a week.

I've definitely seen it get much better for men in the last 10 year. The Court is recognizing how important it is to have a father in children's lives. However, unless men invent a way to have babies the woman is going to ALWAYS be at an advantage in Court with young children because they birthed the child. Sorry but Mom's are just better at taking care of children most of the time.

There are always outliers and cases where Dad is a much much better parent. I see these cases all the time. If Dad can show he is a better parent he is awarded the correct parenting time from the Court. However, the whole idea that men get screwed in family law is wrong. The court does what is best for the children and that often is not what is best for the man.

anonlawstudent
20
3 months ago

Thanks for sharing your perspective. I’m an attorney and my family law attorney friends have said the same thing.

They also point out that in the majority of cases where men don’t get custody, those men aren’t seeking custody.

I wish we could have discussions about custody and parental rights where men were honest instead of “bitch took my kids, judge ruled against me for no good reason” - there are definitely men for whom that’s true but stats and talking to any family law attorney will tell you that’s not the norm.

irr1449
8
3 months ago

Good choice not going into family law. I think the only benefit is that it gets you some decent litigation experience that I might use later.
I agree 100% it hurts the system as a whole if men go into it thinking they are already screwed.
I think most men that start the process don't really understand the financial and parenting impacts of a divorce. The women don't either but I think it is more shocking for the men. A lot of men just don't understand the basic concepts of child support. That it's for the child and that might mean it goes to pay Mom's rent because she needs a home for the child while she has parenting time. People are also in such an emotional place that trying to change their opinion on an issue is extremely difficult.

It sucks for me because my clients are never happy. I am constantly having to explain to them that this is how the system works, etc. Like somehow it's my fault when they pull child support amounts directly from a table. They have to pay me a ton of money not to get what they "want" but to get the best deal for them under the established framework. Often times they get a great deal (relative) but its much less than they "wanted." So even when I do my job the best I can, more often than not the client feels like I'm not on their "side."

I'm actually changing my practice over 100% to personal injury next year. I would rather work fewer cases and make less money than have to deal with these cases all the time.

Ninotchk
10
3 months ago

Men often don't even understand what is involved in parenting because they just play with their kids from time to time and put them to bed. All of the emotional labor is usually done by the mother.

For example, nobody would call my husband a bad father, but the other day he was upset that I'd spent $1000 on clothes in the last month. He just thinks that the childrens clothes magically size up as they grow. Shoes are just there by the back door, magically. Sun hats change in style and size and worn-outness in a similar fashion.

srhlzbth731
7
3 months ago

This is a really good point - I see a lot of anger online about custody and how it favors men.

These same people ignore the fact that women take on the majority of childcare. Even in households where both parents work full time, most mothers do a larger percentage of childcare.

If we lived in a world where all men did 50% of childcare or more, that would be reflected in the courts.

jbloom3
14
3 months ago
AnUnlikelyUsurper
16
3 months ago

r/menslib is less of a circlejerk. They focus more on men's issues and less on antifeminism.

[deleted]
8
3 months ago

[deleted]

Shpookie_Angel
14
3 months ago

What about in Alabama, where the rapist has parental rights? Not trying to judge good people who can make good fathers, but that's f****d up.

that1chick1730
13
3 months ago

I've never understood women who will willing keep their kids from good dads. My SO and I broke up for a bit and it wasnt pretty , but our oldest was still tiny and SO didn't feel comfortable taking care of baby on his own so I went to his place every 2 weeks and stayed the weekend so my kid could get time with his dad. There were weekends we barely spoke but we die it anyway becuase our CHILD was more imporant than being mad.

neuro_nerd220
13
3 months ago

I am a good dad. I love my kids and have always had a great relationship with them. I have never been arrested. I don’t do drugs. I treat others with kindness and respect. I have an excellent career and pay my child support and alimony on time every month. My ex has told my kids the most awful lies about me, to the point that they despise me and make time with me very difficult.

I get to see my kids 3 days a month. I should say, I’m supposed to have them 3 days a month. My ex always plans things for them during my time. I used to fight it, but then the kids resented me. I consider my ex to be the most evil person I’ve ever known. I hope one day my kids will want a relationship with me. It’s been 4 years and I still tear up when I think about them. Kids shouldn’t have to choose. They can love both parents.

dsvolcom23
2
3 months ago

Man I feel your pain. I have a son who lives 400 miles away is 10 now and I get to see him 1 weekend a month. This is one of the roughest things I've ever had to deal with in my life. Know he's out there and not able to have the relationship I'd like with him. I hope your kids see through the smoke your ex is putting out there and are able to have a relationship as well.

officialnast
10
3 months ago

Unless you're unmarried and live in Ohio. In that case being the father means jack shit, until child support comes calling.

Legonator
4
3 months ago

Indeed.

ShitPostMastrGeneral
7
3 months ago

Why the fuck did someone record a TV with their phone and why would anyone think this is a decent enough quality to submit it? Fucking take 5 seconds to search youtube and find the actual recording. Who upvotes this shit?

wooshock
8
3 months ago

TIL custody battles are relatable to a good portion of Reddit's userbase

KoolAidDrank
8
3 months ago

MRA fap material

fizzzingwhizbee
7
3 months ago

Thank god my sons mom (aka my wife) is fuckin awesome and not a little shit like this young lady. Let the man see his kid. I’d be nothing without mine.

slipstream808
7
3 months ago

Come on. This is America. He has the responsibility to pay for his kids but he doesn't have the right to see them.

bminmypeanutbutter
7
3 months ago

we don't know the full story.

what if she was "told" because this father is a raging alcoholic and unfit to be a parent?

atianajt
8
3 months ago

Mothers who win custody and then dangle visitation rights over the fathers heads using their children as revenge/ leverage are the scum of the earth.

justaugusttoo
7
3 months ago

The judge in my divorce told me exwife "he's not a drug addict. You're want the court to treat him like a drug addict."

This was after I voluntarily allowed her to illegal file in a different state, didn't press charges for her committing identity theft and forgery. And, afte I voluntarily offered to pay more child support so he could attend a better school.

You can only fight so long before you run out of money though.

The US treats fathers like shit on average. 2nd class is too high a moniker.

RedKoolAid864
7
3 months ago

“god damn it Karen just let me see the god damn kids”

tragicallywhite
4
3 months ago

That's a Crystal (stripper name "Jasmine") if I've ever seen one.

jamesongineer
5
3 months ago

In Colorado Springs, fathers are second class citizens.

WikN1990
5
3 months ago

Fuck, I love Judge Judy. That bitch keeps it real and puts ignorance in its place. I don't even care that this is a repost. I just love seeing that there are people that help the fathers maintain their relationship with their kids.

djwild5150
5
3 months ago

Yeah fathers should have a voice too!! Like if a woman is going to have an abortion the man should at least...be able to...voice his...I mean...it’s half his kid....I...sorry...

[deleted]
6
3 months ago

[deleted]

Zangalanga_Dingdong
5
3 months ago

Let's take a video of a video that's been reposted for years, and mute it, crop it vertically and add subtitles that take up 1/4 of the screen. Yay.

[deleted]
3
3 months ago

Impressed huh? lol

[deleted]
6
3 months ago

[deleted]

johann_vandersloot
5
3 months ago

Angry mra convention

ixlHD
5
3 months ago

Im all for parents being 50/50 but this case he was threatening to take the daughter at 1:30 am because she wasn't allowing him to apologize for something and he refused to let her sleep until she listened to him.

NeverSpeakInTongues
4
3 months ago

But what if the dad really is a deadbeat? What if he really isn't a good father? What if he never comes to see his kids? Spits out false promises to his kids? Sends money only when he wants? what bif he never buys them school supplies, clothes, meds when they are sick because he says he doesn't have money yet he buys new PS4 games weekly, always eats out, and constantly has a new gadget at home? What if he says he refuses to help discipline his kids even if over the phone because it's not his problem?

Is he still equal to mom? Does he still deserve to come see his kids and take them? Is he still not a second class citizen??

Not all dad's (or mom's) are the same. Every parent has the capacity of being a horrible parent. So don't assume that every single parent that doesn't have custody of their kids is because it's against their will. Some choose not to be parents.

SSDGM24
4
3 months ago

I agree with your point completely but when gifs are posted instead of a video with sound, it makes me sad. What’s the point of watching a gif of judge Judy, when I can’t hear her screeching judgement and I can’t hear this idiot lady’s indignant insistence that she was doing the right thing?

Droymac
4
3 months ago

You’re all getting riled up over how men are treated in custody battles, when in Alabama if your uncle rapes and impregnates you, can’t get an abortion OR deny visitation rights.

I’m right here with y’all on wanting the stable parent to get custody, but this “because I’m a guy” stuff is bullshit.

jixxor
3
3 months ago

Is this real ? I see that judge a lot and she is very cool from what I saw

beansarenotfruit
7
3 months ago

She’s a legit judge on a daytime TV show. The show pays the money instead of the losing party, but sometimes the judgement actually has an effect, such as in this case or in another about who owned a dog. She’s CRAZY rich, but she actually seems like a really great person.

Dont-be-a-smurf
6
3 months ago

This is what it actually is:

It’s not a legal courtroom. She’s not an actual judge. There’s little to no government involvement here. However, Judy was a judge in the past.

This is actually an “arbitration hearing” dressed up as a mock-courtroom and played up on TV.

Arbitration is essentially entering into a private contract to have your case heard by a private arbiter and you agree that you’ll abide by the “ruling” because you’re entering into a contract to do so.

It does not have the same formalities, regulations, or appeals potential of an actual courtroom.

Source: am a lawyer, and coincidentally a colleague was on the show.

Wsing1974
4
3 months ago

It's real, but it's small claims court. Unlikely they were deciding custody here.

euanmac369
3
3 months ago

Can someone link this with sound? It doesn’t look like the subtitles are even remotely what is being said

sammy0790
3
3 months ago

The subtitles size was so big that I forgot watch their faces 😂😂

godrestsinreason
3
3 months ago

I love Judge Judy. I love it when people go to her with complete misunderstandings and misconceptions of what the law is.

BallShapedMan
3
3 months ago

And for all her flaws, this is why I still appreciate Judge Judy. As a divorced father I really appreciate this view.

zamardii12
4
3 months ago

Women who do not let their fathers see their children are evil and should go to jail for it if doing it all the time. I hear about this way too much and it makes me sick.

RattleMeSkelebones
3
3 months ago

Judy always been spitting truth

Capt_Snowfl4ke
3
3 months ago

Am I to understand that there was a custody battle on Judge Judy?

Stylin_N_Profilin1
2
3 months ago

Uh.... "Judge" Judy........ As long as there are "A lot of Judges out there who don't get it (real Judges, not fake tv ones) Then men actually are 2nd class citizens as far as child custody is concerned.

mynewusername69
3
3 months ago

Im a single mom. My sons father is still a dirty homless man (got pregnant while homeless, got off the streets to raise my baby) hes only met my son a few times. I dont trust him at all. He is a terrible influence. However he is still allowed to see his son because i know he wont hurt him and its his kid after all. I wish he would at least try to see him more, my son gets really sad sometimes about not knowing his dad. I could never hurt him by keeping them apart unless it was dangerous for my son. I hate when women kerp their kids from their dad to hurt him, it always hurts the kids more.

simpletonclass
3
3 months ago

I know everyone is pro father here. But we do not know what is going on here. Different issues for everyone here. I know someone who was in a relationship, my cousin and her boyfriend. Split up. Guy went to have another baby with another girl at the same time as her pregnancy. Abandoned my cousin. Never went to any check ups for her or her baby. Requested for her to abort the child. During the birth, guy did not show up. Never cared for her or the baby. She’s had to manage all by herself. Fast forward a month later, he wants to be there. So yeah I think in this case the father does not deserve to be a part of the baby’s life when he chooses. She might come around later on to let him see. But as he decided he did not want to be a part of his. She can decide he should not be a part of his.

billsboy88
3
3 months ago

Say what you will about Judy, but the older I get, the more I realize that woman has one heck of a good head on her shoulders